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When I read your words I remembered how I felt when my Blue passed on. The grief consumed me. I couldn't sleep, work was almost impossible and I cried all the time. It has been 6 months and I still feel very lonely without Blue in the house. I feel his presence, I think about him all the time but my thoughts are not the same.
Every time I think about him I think about the great times we had together and how happy he must be to be rid of the pain and suffering. I have his pictures everywhere. I will never forget him. I hope that soon you will be at that point. Remember that Stewie is happy and healthy where he is now.
