My Last Hope

by Rohini Singh
(Mathura, UTTAR PRADESH, INDIA)

As the days are passing & 23rd January is coming, I am remembering the last year, when my cutest and adorable and unforgettable baby boy Sherry was with me.

Though, sometimes, when this pain is crossing my limits, I used to involve in some other work. After Luana, I thought my baby is my last hope & at least my one baby is with me. But, I never thought that God had planned something else.

Though,After my baby doll Luana, my heart was broken. But, somehow I had controlled myself. because of my baby Sherry only.

Since, 24th December 2011 my baby was sick. Since, then to 23rd January 2012 I could not sleep well. During the whole night & days, I accompanied him. Though, my sister was also taking care of him. She loved him very much. Actually, only due to her, my family had kept them. They were born in my house by black(f)Labra. So, when my sister went for her further education, she handed over both of them to me for taking care of them only for 2 years. Though my father was also there. But due to old age, she cannot leave both of them on him. So she also asked me. I too loved them & definitely, I can never leave them in her absence. She knew that. Already, she had completed & only her last year was remaining & after 6 months, she was coming back. We all had planned how we will prepare their food menu, check ups at home. Then we will take them in car etc. These were the plannings for them by us after coming back at home.

We all were attached too much with them. Because at that time after my mother`s unexpected departure, we were also in mental agony. But, when they born, we were involved in taking care of them. By looking their naughty activities & their love & affection and warm welcome, when we came at home. So during the whole day & night, we were behind them. We never left them alone. If somebody had come at home and We kept them inside then whatever they found in front of them, they used to destroy. They had broken my 4 mobiles. But I didn`t say anything to them. They destroyed my shoes and even file of my brother. Though, my brother was angry but my father stopped him. So, nobody scolded them.

They were sleeping with us. Even during summer season, my father had brought air conditioning for them. So in hot weather, they can sleep well. After that they were used of that. Even they asked for air conditioning sometimes.

Now, one secret of mine, which I want to share my all dog-lover friends that since my childhood period, I was so crazy & wanted they should love me & follow me only. But,it never happened. So I was so jealous, if my dogs were loving somebody else in front of me. When my sister was teasing me for this. Then, I used to forced them to come to me. But, they didn`t come to me. Rather, they ran faraway from me. And Once, they came to behind me. I was feeling so happy.


But, my these two cutie kids, I must say fulfilled my all desires. Even, sometimes, I got irritated if they had come to me. I can never ever forget when I came back from anywhere my babies were standing on the door to welcome me! The thing that I can never forget that when my mother was always standing on door when I leave home or when I came back at home. So, as my cutest Cinderella my Lullu (Luana), she was always there whether I'm coming home or leaving home. If anybody was scolding her, she always ran away from there and came to me. She knew that I will protect her.

Once, I had surgery, when I came at home, nobody allowed her to come to me because she always used to come and keeping her head on my stomach. So, when I was sleeping in other room with my sister. During the night, I found that somebody was sitting near to me, and when I watched, she was my baby Lullu. She had not kept her head on me as she used to this. My sister got up & when she tried to take her but I stopped her.

The other incident is for my baby boy Sherry. Once when I was getting bored I came to the window of my house & I was peeping outside. At that time Sherry was inside the room with my sister. Sherry was so loving & protective for all of us. Though, he was so young. So he was taking the round of house. After taking the round of whole house, he went to my room & when he didn`t find me there, he came outside, where I was standing & staring outside. He kept his both upper legs on wall & watched outside with me. When he found nobody was there, then he snatched my cloth & pulled me inside the room, and I sat on the bed, then he went from room.

There are lots of incidents of them, if I will write. These pages will be not enough. After my Luana, I was thinking at least my Sherry is with me & I can watch in him my Luana too. I was trying to make myself though I knew that my both babies are having their own place in my heart & soul. But ,I don`t know what is God`s wish? He has taken my both babies together.

I prayed one month to save my one baby at least. I cried in front of God To save my last hope. But, he didn`t listen to me. After Sherry, I lost my everything. I was shocked why God has done this to me? What punishment he wants to give me? Because, suddenly, he has finished my everything, my kids, hope, faith, life & future dreams etc. Whenever I think last year at this time my baby was with me & suffering. I never thought that once, he too left me one day. I was thinking that maybe God cannot be so cruel with me & he will save my baby.

Since my childhood, I was so God fearing person. There are lots of decisions, I accepted whether it was in my favor or against. Though, sometimes, I used to be unhappy but later on I wished O God your wish will be done. He has taken many things from my life & I have no regret for that. But, this time, I just want to ask him why he has done this to me? I have no regret that he has not fulfilled my all or one desire. But, only for this matter, I want to know from him? Now, I just want from him that kindly send me too, where my babies are. Don`t know whether he will complete my this last wish or not?

Thanking You
Rohini Singh