Your Pet Loss Diaries

'Hilary & Suzy'

Coming to Terms

July 14, 2009

I spent the weekend in misery. Friday, July 10th was one week since I lost Suzy. It was a horrible day and an equally horrible night. I miss her so much that my chest caves everytime I walk into my door.

I got the call yesterday, July 13, 2009 that Suzy was ready to be picked up.

It was one of the hardest and easiest things to do. I knew that my Suzy was home at last. I knew that no matter what, she would always be home and I wouldn't have to "look" for her any longer.

I set up a memorial space for her. On one of my bedside tables sits her blanket (which was mine as a baby), neatly folded into a small square, a wonderful picture of Suzy, and now her urn is behind it. It's a cat statue urn, so you'd never know what it really was unless you asked. It's so beautiful, it's heart breaking.

I try to get through my times with the knowledge that Sybil is waiting for me at home, and I owe it to her to "keep it together" and make sure that she's not being ignored, but I find it so hard to remain inside once I get there.... It's like I'm so anxious to get home, and then once I'm there, I'm so anxious to get right back out. I sit outside, smoke and talk on the phone to people, all so I can avoid going back inside.

I know this is wrong. I know that I need to be able to provide companionship for Sybil, but at the same time I just miss Suzy so intensely, it's hard for me to even concentrate.


Click here to go straight to the next page of this diary

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Pet Loss Diaries - 'Hilary & Suzy'.