Your Pet Loss Diaries

Nov 10, 2011

by Margaret

I'm thinking of you everyday, like I always do. I still miss you so very much, nothing will ever change that. I'm still so sad, because you and I were so very close. I got the heart pet cremation pendant in the mail last Saturday, and it was beautiful, but has some flaws. And, Daddy had to put some of your precious cremains in to it, because I'm still too emotional to do that just yet. It's really nice, but has some issues, but I'm still glad to have and wear/hold you so close in my heart, I promise I will upgrade you to the one I really wanted, as soon as I can afford it.

Nothing money could buy, would ever bring you back to me, but at least I was blessed with you for so many years, years I took for granted, I realize now. And how special the times we shared were! If I could go back, I'd do much more with you than I did. I think I took you for granted so much, and I'm so sorry. But, you know I loved you with all my heart and soul, still do, and always will. I just miss & love you so very much.

I still can't go to our special parks just yet, I dont know if I will again. it's too painful yet for me, I know you understand. Will I ever get over the pain of your loss? I just don't know. We had so, so many good times/walks/memories there.

I hope you know letting you go was the hardest, most painful decision I've ever made. And I'm still questioning myself, was it the right thing to do for you? My baby was hurting, and old, and had so many issues, I felt it was the best thing for you, not me, to let you go, as I loved you so very much, I didn't want you to suffer anymore. But it's been horrible for me, your loss, and how very much I love and miss you still! And always will.

I pray to God every day and night, I can feel your spirit. Sometimes I feel a little bit of you, but not enough for me. I need you to tell me I was right, and that you are at peace now, and we will someday be together again. I need to know this so very, very much. Please let your spirit be happy, not sad, but please I pray to God, keep my baby Max safe, happy & let us someday be reunited once again.

If there's a heaven, you are there for sure. Only hope I can merit that place, so I can see/be with you once again. God blessed me with you, for so very long, just not long enough. And I'd never be ready to say goodbye to you, I still can't!

Love & miss you 4ever & always my sweet baby Max.