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Thank you Margaret for all your loving and kind words. you are obviously a much stronger person than I am and a more wonderful mummy to your SPIKE than I ever was to my babies.
I would have loved to have shown a fraction of your devotion and love to my Zeusy and Shimma as you showed to your beautiful boy.
I will live in hell for the moment for what I did or didn't do for my forever friends, but I will live with that as I have no choice.
I am lucky as I have 2 beautiful babies still, Lola and Wolfie,who I love to bits, but the pain and guilt of my loss never seems to go away, life and love of our doggies never wanes.
Thank you for reading and listening cos no-one else never seems to understand...
Thankyou...
Theresa x
Theresa, Zeus & Shimma by: Margaret Handy-Williams, Dartmouth, NS, CA
Oh Theresa, the deep and excruiting pain you are continuing to endure is (and you're right) messing you up.
We all feel guilty for whatever certain reason after putting down our beloved pets .. our hearts weighing over the 'what if's' and 'shoulds of's. Over time we deal with our guilty emotions, and we forgive and reason with ourselves .. smile fondly when we talk and think of our precious pets.
It's unfortunate you are finding no relief in your (now) guilt, and ongoing guilt (that stems back to your previous pets). Perhaps your guilt comes from having no control when you had to put your pets down. Though it was their time, you seem to be punishing yourself for their death.
And though you claim you were too busy, you must have a few nice memories of Zeus & Shimma.
A few years back, Dr Phil was on Oprah. He listened to this woman who lost her daughter (at the time of the show, it was 10 yrs back) to a murderer. The woman/mother felt huge grief to feeling guilty to horrible anxiety. All normal emotions. But she stayed stuck with these painful emotions the day her daughter was murdered for ten LONG years. The mother said to Dr Phil she wasn't there to protect her daughter. She had no control over what happened. The mother punished herself feeling horrible pain and stopped living.
Dr. Phil suggested she celebrate her dead daughter's life instead on of her murder/death.
