Your Pet Loss Stories

'Buddy, My Friend'

by Mario
(Rancho Cucamonga, CA, USA)

My hope, in telling our story, is to maybe give hope and help someone in a similar situation. Our story is a tragic one in that my wife and I were responsible for our Buddy having to be put down much too soon. If anyone is to blame it’s me and dealing with the heavy grief and guilt I feel has been one of the most heart wrenching things I’ve had to work through.

Buddy blessed our lives for a short 6 months. He was a fearful, stinky, neglected little soul when we first rescued him from the Rancho Cucamonga Animal Shelter in California. His eyes spoke to me and I knew with a little tender loving care he was gonna be alright. And, he was. The progress he made in that short a time was something to see. Of course it took some patience and a lot of TLC, but he appreciated it and that’s what made me love him so much.

As I reflect today on New Year’s Day 2013 there has not been a day Buddy has not been in my mind since that dreadful day on the 29th of April 2012. In short, we had a tragic accident where Buddy walked across my wife’s lap and attempted to leap out the passenger side window of my moving truck on our way home from the park. I felt the rear passenger tire run over his little body and heard his screaming quickly afterward. My poor baby boy. It’s difficult not to tell our story without a lot of detail, but please trust me when I say we are very safety conscience animal lovers with 4 cats and 2 Golden Retrievers and especially when transporting our pooches anywhere in our vehicles. With that being said, this one day we had a lapse of judgement on our less than 5 minute drive home from the park. It was a surreal, horrific experience.

Buddy did quiet down shortly after and I rushed him to our local animal hospital, in a PetSmart store, which was a big mistake. I would STRONGLY advise an emergency hospital in an emergency situation. This hospital assured me Buddy would be sedated and taken care and would call me immediately with a prognosis. Well, after calling twice and being reassured Buddy was fine and sleeping, sadly Buddy was not fine and I had to make the decision to put him down later that evening. My poor baby neglected and suffering at the hospital. As he was brought in to me in that cold exam room, my wife unable to & crying outside the room, I lay next to him and said my goodbyes and expressed my deep regret and love. He looked over to me and for a brief moment, he seemed happy I was there but then the pain he was in I know made him turn away. I emphatically demanded the Dr. to put him out of his misery.

I cried and cried like a baby. I asked God why him? Why this poor, little defenseless loving creature? I’ve had other devastating loss in my life and my faith in God has never wavered. I’ve come to grips that God allows certain things to just happen. Only he knows why? And to try to make our tiny brains comprehend that His ways are not our ways is difficult, to say the least. It’s ok to get angry with God but not for long. In time, it’s important to surrender to Him and trust Him to take care of us and help us through our pain. After all, He is the maker of the universe and sent his only Son to suffer and die for us, right?

God knows what we feel and are going through and that’s comforting to know that the King of Kings the Lord of Lords loves and cares about me crying over my Buddy or any other loss in our lives. Having to endure pain and suffering here on earth is difficult but it’s something we have to go through to humble us and bring us closer to God. I’ve learned that holding on to God’s promises in his word helps the grieving process. Also, is a great resource. I wanted to learn how to deal with grief and to be better equipped and found the curriculum and group setting to be very helpful, especially a Christian based group. There are different types of grief but most common is the loss of a loved one. Another good resource is a book titled Heaven by Randy Alcorn. There are a couple of chapters on animals I found interesting.

Well, if you read this far along I Thank you kindly and hope it helped you. Thank you Bunny Hankers for this site and helping people like me express ourselves a bit and share our story. Buddy was a tender soul and I’m a better man for knowing him. I thank God for that opportunity and since He knows my wish I’m sure Buddy and I will meet again, maybe at a rainbow bridge, which would be awesome! Thanks again… Mario from Rancho Cucamonga, CA, USA

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