Your Pet Loss Stories

by Jody
(Kansas)

The only thing that made my heart feel better was to hold Charlie Chan. The boy was my soul mate, so special to me that from the time I laid my eyes on him, my whole entire world changed. I never once wanted to be apart from him, tried to take him everywhere with me. Because of me not wanting him to be alone, I ended up with his sister and litter mate, Lucy Tui. They were absolutely the loves of my life. I called them my twins. They never spent one night apart from each other in the 12 and a half years that I had them. When one went to the vet, the other went too. They were kept in the same crate, if they needed to be crated, which wasn't often. If I traveled, they went. If I moved, the home I picked out, evolved around them. Through any kind of troubles in my life, I always looked forward to coming home, or spending time with my twins. It seemed perfect for a long time.

Charlie was diagnosed with an enlarged heart. It's like a blur, I can't remember what date that was. I think I thought it was no big deal. He gradually got sicker, as I was constantly adding more and more meds, and trying to adjust our every minute to make him get better. Nothing worked, he was struggling so hard. I begged God to help me do the right thing.... took Charlie to our vet last friday, the 2nd of September, and his physical body didn't come home with us.

I thought I was going to die of pain, actually thought I was ready to cross the Rainbow Bridge. The pain is so intense, I had forgotten how torturous the loss of the physical can be.

I am here with his sister Lucy, and also our latest member Le Roy. I am focusing on celebrating my Charlie's life through loving these two here - if not for him, I wouldn't know that I could love these little spirits so much. The love and joy I received while having him here, is worth every ounce of pain I'm going through now. This morning I was finally able to force myself to for my morning jog, which I always did alone - today was the first day that Charlie could go for a jog with me, and I realize that we will always be together now, he's in my heart and mind.