by Amy Bradley
(Ocean Springs, MS, US)
My baby boy Charlie was given to me as a gift on my birthday by my best friend and room mate. He was already attached to her when she gave him to me. I did not want to get too close to him in the beginning because she had some addiction problems and I assumed when she would go off on her drug induced tangents that she would take him with her. Well, I was wrong. She left but left Charlie with me. I felt so sorry for the little fellow. He would just curl up by the door and wait for her. As time went on, the little fellow and I formed such a special bond that I can't put into words. He was treated like a little king and was spoiled rotten. That was five years ago.
On September 10, 2011, I had to go out of town for my nieces' 16th birthday. I asked a friend of mine to keep him for me. Charlie did not know this person very well but I left him there anyway. I thought it would be better than boarding him because he was a kind of nervous dog and did not like a lot of noise and I knew she treated her own dog like a baby so I knew she would treat Charlie fine too. I did have some reservations because her dog was a puppy but she was a small English Bulldog.
I received a call around 11:00 with my friend saying he had gotten out of his collar and run away. I flew back home only to find my baby laying in the street. I picked him up and told him I was so sorry and I loved him so much. I rushed him to the hospital and they said there was nothing they could do. I just keep thinking that my baby was so scared and died looking for me. If I could only turn back time.....
I am having him cremated today and I am sick. It is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I do not want to say goodbye to my baby and I miss him so much. I feel so guilty thinking he was so scared and looking for his mother. I am distraught. I wish I could turn back time and do things differently. Mommas loves her baby boy!
The friend that gave me Charlie has been in a treatment program for about a year now and did come back to see Charlie on several occasions and Charlie knew who she was and loved her just as much as he did in the beginning. That is unconditional love.
God bless you Charlie and just know how sorry I am for leaving you and I love you so very much. Do not be afraid. We all love you and I can not put into words how much you are missed!
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