Your Pet Loss Stories

'Too Many... Too Many'

by Rose
(Ontario Canada)

I'm 52 and I had 5 cats and a dog. Sweetpea, Angel, Nikki, Tigger, Charlie and then our dog Eolis a mixed breed shepherd sized dog who meant the world to me too... Get this, all these animals died within 2 years. Eolis and Tigger passed 1 day apart and each and every of these animals had to be put to sleep.

My animals are my babies, in fact based on my experience in life with people. I prefer animals. I have very few friends but two loving children, now grown and a very loving husband. I slowly built up my animals again... I have 3 bengals a shorthair domestic, and still a 16 year old from the old bunch left over (who by the way is not doing so good). After 2 years of my dog passing I even got a puppy that is the love of my life... a little Shorkie called Meesha (russian for little bear). She is half yorkshire terrier and half Shitzu.

I cannot, cannot, cannot get out of the depression stage. Every day I get up I remember the faces of each of my darlings as they were put to sleep. My dog Eolis especially because he didn't want to go... he whined and carried on and was very hard to put down because he wanted to hang on... I see his eyes... his look. Sweetpea was another one... she bit me as the shot when in and then looked up at me apologetically and licked my hand before she took her final breath.

To top all this off. The very first animal I got after all these passings was a little Bengal called Mew... she had a problem at 7 months old, suddenly got very very sick, and within hours we were told by the vet that her uterus was inflamed and she had to be put down. She grew close to us very fast because she was the first baby back in the house. She retrieved water bottle caps in her mouth. When they flipped upside down she would manipulate it with both paws til it was right side up and she could pick it up with her mouth.

OMG... I am so sad. I don't know why I get up anymore... I can't stop seeing all their faces. I hear their whining as they went, they haunt me. I loved them all soooo much. How do I get out of this depression.

I actually set this video up a couple of months before she went... and set it to my own music. I haven't touched my music since. Due to my bad back and constant migraines I was put on disability to further aggravate the situation. If anyone has any ideas how to get out of this rut of depression please let me know. I think 3 years is long enough.

I've recently been starting to suffer from chest pains so I know it's not doing my health any good. Realize though that this went from one pet to the other for 2 years. I want to start living again, I really do. I love my new puppy and my new cats. I just can't forget my other babies at the Rainbow bridge. And god I hope there is one.


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