At which stage of pet loss grief do you feel you are currently at?
At this time it is hard for me to determine what stage of grief, it feels like a mixture. I am angry that God allowed me to lose Tang at this time because I lost my job 8 months ago. I feel guilty because I was not with Tang when the doctor put him down. The waves of sadness and crying come when I least expect it.
Lona and Tang's Story so far
My Husband brought Tang home 16 years ago, he had found him in a warehouse abandoned by his mother. I thought he was the ugliest cat in town, he had the biggest ears I had ever seen on a kitten! We had to give him three baths to get rid of the flees. At first he became my Daughter Angle's cat because she was the one who took care of him but over the years he "grew" on me.
We lived in a two story house so every morning I would carry him downstairs like he was a baby and I discovered that he liked to be carried around the house and sniff at things he wouldn't be able to reach, in fact he loved being carried around in anything, a box, laundry basket even a bag.
He was a rascle from the beginning, climbing up the Christmas trees, trying to escape at every opportunity (he was an inside cat.) Tang loved to be in or on top of anything new that was brought into our house and we would find him in some unusual places like on top of the coat rack or hidden inside one of the closets. He was quite entertaining too, he could jump five feet in the air. We would make a ball out of a little paper bag and he would play catch with us. Oh, and he would run through the house pinging off the walls!
At first he wasn't a lap cat but as he got older he would sit in my lap. He was very sensitive to my feelings too, whenever I was sad he would come and just "be with me." Tang loved to be brushed and would come running whenever I would tap his brush on the floor. He always slept with me at the foot of my bed making sure his body would be touching my legs. The last few months of his life he seemed to have a ritual, in the early evenings he would follow me around the house until I settled in my recliner to cross stitch and then he would sit in my lap.
It feels good to be able to talk about him without feeling like I am boring someone.
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