Your Pet Loss Diaries
'Louise & Seth'
Seth my 10 year old Staffordshire Bull Terrier with black and brindle markings.
When did you lose Seth?
5 days ago. 21st May 2012.
At which stage of pet loss grief do you feel you are currently at?
Or how are you feeling right now?
Denial and anger.
Louise and Seth's Story so far
Seth was originally my husbands dog. We met 11 years ago & 12 months later when we bought a house we knew we wanted dogs. I wanted a Rottweiler and he a Staffy. Unwilling to compromise, we got both..
Seth was first, he moved in with us and spent the first night in our own home next to us in a wooden laundry basket. He was beautiful! But oh so cheeky too! He was full of mischief and always in trouble. 8 weeks later, my Chopper arrived. He was the most gentle, timid little soul. At first, Seth was quite rough & cruel to Chopper but it didn't last long. They were soon best friends and constantly played, fought and defended one another.
The years passed quickly and both our boys had bad luck with various illness and spent many a time at the local vet undergoing surgeries and other major procedures. You could say they were accident prone! But in November, 2008 we had no idea of what was in store for us.
The day started like any other when I opened the sliding door for the boys and shuffled past them, trying not to spill my coffee all over my self. I sat down outside I my usual spot and was absorbing the early morning sunshine when Seth came close, hinting for a pat. As I ran my hand down his back, I knew something was wrong straight away. I could feel his spine protruding through his skin and fur!
We had noticed him gaining weight in the months before and had reluctantly cut back his food but he still seemed to be looking "chubby". After discussing it with my husband we quickly raced him to the vet and what came next was unbearable. 5 days, 6 blood transfusions, removal of a 3 1/2 kg splenic tumour and over $5,000 in vet bills with us being told to say good-bye to him as we was not expected to survive. But he did and he amazed vets, nurses and us alike. Even more amazing, the splenic tumour which are renowned for being malignant turned out to be benign.
Seth came home and recovered quickly, continuing to be his cheeky little self within weeks. However he was never quite the same and his level of fitness never returned. He was crowned "pet of the month" at his local vet and was their special little miracle. That was over three years ago now and although we knew this day would come, neither of us expected it so suddenly.
He fell ill last Friday night and by 12pm Saturday morning we had been advised that he most likely had a bleeding mass inside his stomach and would need to be euthanized within 24 hours. We brought him home with morphine and spent our last moments with him at home until we took him back to the vet on Sunday to say our final good-byes. We held him and comfortated him up until his last breathe and we looked into his beautiful brown eyes as he fell asleep.
The moments after where horrific in my mind, I was so inconsolable and could not control my emotions or my tears. And then I saw my husband of 11 years cry for the first time. My heart was shattered into pieces at that moment. And The overwhelming grief has consumed my every waking moment ever since... I feel so lost and no longer feel like a "mother" as I have no "baby's" anymore. I miss my little man so much and don't know how I will ever survive.
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